From the despondent desk of Rick Vigorous:
I sent this to you via speedy courier as it concerns private matters touching you most nearly. I have waived my usual nominal fee for divulgence because your psychic health takes precedence now.
Please pay the bike messenger a nominal fee equal to my usual fee for his timely services.
Rex Young has also received a copy.
-Jay
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LENORE: I had genuinely forgotten what it was like to be touched when every single nerve, every piece of you is begging for contact: for fire and electricity. We haven't known each other long, but I have a wonderful feeling about him. I just wanted to come and tell you, because I think I'm finally prepared to discontinue our sessions here -
JAY: As your therapist, I strongly discourage the discontinuation of our sessions.
LENORE: In the morning, we laid there and little blocks of light slipping through the blinds seemed to graze his wine-dark skin...
JAY: This man is some variation of nubian?
LENORE: He slept facing me. I don't think a man has ever done that before. Usually, when we're finished making love and it's time for bed, a man will turn away from me, having so blatantly got what he wanted - he can't even be bothered to look -
JAY: Perhaps he's more comfortable that way, the practical mechanics of sleeping whilst cradling a woman are -
LENORE: He likes my drawings. He thinks I should try to draw more... maybe even quit my job at F + V.
JAY: He does not like your drawings.
LENORE: Excuse me?
JAY: He doesn't like your drawings. I'm sorry. I hate to say it, but no man in the history of men has ever liked a woman's drawings. Blocks of light have never grazed any wine-dark man's skin. You're being fooled: this man is fooling you. What's his name anyway?
LENORE: Leo.
JAY: Leo? That's not his real name. That's a made up name.
LENORE: What? I don't understand why you'd say that. He has been so good to me...
JAY: I know this man. There is only one type of man whose unfulfilled oedipal desires would drive him to stoop so low as to tell a woman he liked her drawings despite an almost disgusting lack of talent -
LENORE: But you've never seen my drawings...
JAY: This man, "Leo", suffers from a very unique, dangerous type of vanity: third order vanity.
LENORE: Third order?
JAY: Well, a third-order vain person is first of all a vain person. He’s vain about his intelligence, and wants people to think he’s smart. Or his appearance, and wants people to think he’s attractive. Or, say, his sense of humour, and wants everyone to think he’s amusing and witty. Or his talent, and wants everyone to think he’s talented. Et cetera. You know what a vain person is. That's standard first order stuff.
LENORE: Okay.
JAY: Now a second-order vain person is a vain person who’s also vain about appearing to have an utter lack of vanity. Who’s enormously afraid that other people will perceive him as vain. A second-order vain person will sit up late learning jokes in order to appear funny and charming, but will deny that he sits up late learning jokes. Or he’ll perhaps even try to give the impression that he doesn’t regard himself as funny at all.`
LENORE: Got it.
JAY: Okay, now, pay attention to this third-order vain person. This person is cleverer than the second-order vain person. This man derives his selfish, vain pleasures from appearing to be utterly selfless. This man will sleep facing you, even though it's completely absurd. This man will tell you that he likes your drawings even though they're such obvious rip offs of your favorite illustrators that they can hardly be called yours -
LENORE: Hey, I -
JAY: Focus, because this is important. This man will call himself something like "Leo", even though no one is actually called that and he'll make love to you the way you want him to make love to you, because that's what makes him feel worthwhile. He'll cook for you, he'll - and I can barely believe this - claim to actually enjoy performing cunnilingus on you, even though no man actually enjoys that.
LENORE: He did say that and he's an excellent cook -
JAY: Of course. Now, what makes these men so dangerous is that it is only the novelty of the situation that makes their operation successful. Almost all of their enjoyment comes from watching the woman be surprised by their attentiveness, gentleness, etc., because they know that most women have never experienced anything like it, but this cannot last. Give "Leo" a month... maybe two and he'll move on to find someone else he can watch be amazed by him.
LENORE: But I don't understand... he told me a very dark secret. Why would he do that if he were just trying to amaze me?
JAY: Depending on the secret, it may because he was attempting to allay your suspicion as to whether he was "too perfect" - an attempt to seem human, or an attempt to make himself seem as vulnerable as he knows you're afraid you are. What was the secret?
LENORE: It was a very complicated and involved, ghastly story... you see, Leo was adopted and he grew up poor. His foster parents loved him, but they died early on and he had to fend for himself. When he was only 17, he began having an affair with an older, wealthy married woman who rewarded his love with things he needed: an apartment, a car, etc. Anyway, one night, after he dropped the woman off at her upscale highrise, he was attacked by a man who was wild with grief. Leo didn't mean to, but he killed him in the scuffle. It came out in the court proceedings that she was driven to the whole affair because she resented her husband for giving their son up for adoption back when she was only his mistress and not his wife. In the course of the case, the son was tracked down: the boy was Leo. Leo had accidentally killed his own father and slept with his mother.
JAY: ...
LENORE: Are you okay? You look ill.
JAY:...
LENORE: Oh my god! Don't worry. We can clean that up.
JAY: ...
LENORE: Jay?
JAY: ...
LENORE: What do you think about Leo now? Is he okay? That's not third-order vanity type stuff is it? That story?
JAY: ...
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